40 Days until I Turn 40

I won't bore you with my never ending tale of feeling inadequate and trapped by a lack of discipline in a few areas of life while showing great discipline in other areas.  I have blogged about it before.  I don't even want to hear it.  I am ready to lay it down.  Lay down my inadequacies, worries, short comings, stress, and anxiety and realize I alone can't change it.  I need the power of the Holy Spirit for life change.  I am turning 40 in 40 days.  I need to go into this birthday with some personal achievement.  Short term, clear, written down goals for the next 40 days.

1.  Burn at least 500 calories through exercise each day
2.  Run at least a mile each day (I did this before and it was in a sense freeing)
3.  Every other day add jump rope and some strength builders (Burpees, push-ups, sit ups etc.  I will
     look online for  an actual plan)
3.  No added sugar
4.  Prism devotional
5.  Calorie count of 1500 a day
6.  More sleep - be in bed by 10:45

Words

Ever notice how Psalms are written? Often with a feeling of discord, questioning of self, at the beginning. Then there is the reminder that we follow a loving God, a God worthy to be praised no matter what goes on in life. That is how I feel right now. In a few words I feel:

Embarrassed

Unhappy

Disappointed

Stressed

"Here we go again"

Never follow through

(My eye opener) my size hindered my family vacation.....really?! It's pretty bad when you can't ride rides because dad is too big. A serious low point for me. 

Failure

Project

Start fresh

Can't do this on my own

Only with God's help

Forget the past

Look ahead

For my kids

For my wife

For my life

Changes coming soon. Be watching for a plan. 

Tomorrow night I will share. 

I know....you are thinking what I'm thinking "I've heard this before...what is different?"  I don't know but I have to try. Too much at stake.